Delta Airlines thought you might. So they installed 6 video cameras into a piece of checked luggage. Then they recorded what the luggage ‘saw’ as it was sent from Atlanta to New York City. The result is this fun short video (2 min 43 secs). It’s scored with a trippy New Age soundtrack that’ll make you wish you were partying and dancing with your bag all the way to JFK.
On the way, we witness the bag being lovingly manhandled by faceless, blurred out luggage handlers. They either look like dreamy angels, or nightmares of that creepy, molest-y uncle.
We also see the bag arrive safely in New York. Actually, come to think of it, we don’t see the bag arrive since the camera lens is shooting outwards.
So I guess the camera made it, but we have no idea if it was still attached to the bag.
Other things we don’t see in this video:
1) Luggage moving slowly. Delta has cannily sped up the footage so it appears like your suitcase gets to your destination before you do.
2) We also don’t see suitcases being stomped on by gorillas, or for that matter, dragged through garbage, puddles, or human filth. Which is comforting. I’m liking these Delta folks more and more. I’m almost happy these saints charge me $25 to check my bag.
3) When the bag goes through the TSA scan area, the screen goes black because no photography is allowed. Possibly because that’s where TSA guards are opening your bag and trying on your underwear.
4) We don’t see luggage handlers giggling as they send your bag to Australia instead of Austria.
5) We also don’t see luggage handlers giggling as they remove your stuff and switch it with a similar bag’s contents. Then send them both to Australia.
The teaser at the end of the video reads: “Now you can track your bag’s journey”. Alas, this doesn’t mean you’re allowed to drill holes in your suitcases and install nannycams to spy on airport employees. No, it’s actually a clever way of introducing their new baggage-tracking app.
Similar to how courier companies let you track the progress of your parcels, their free app lets you spy on your Samsonite. It’s available for iPhone, BlackBerry, Android, and Windows Phone. It also lets you check in, change your seat, get flight alerts, and rebook flights if you’d rather spy on another cargo hold.
Download it here – and start spying the friendly skies.
— Ken Hegan