So I don’t really care who Aubrey O’Day is.
According to the Internets, she’s an American singer, actress, fashion designer, and former member of the girl group Danity Kane. Plus Donald Trump fired her from his reality show Celebrity Apprentice.
I only mention O’Day, 28, because this week she Tweeted a pic of her chilling out with her dogs. On an airplane, and in first class, no less. Here’s the photo:
You might be wondering ‘How did O’Day sneak her dogs on the plane? Did she hypnotize the airline staff into believing her pooches were members of the cabin crew?’
Nope. According to TMZ (so it must be true), a rep for Virgin Airlines said she was cleared to bring her dogs aboard their plane because they are registered as “Emotional Support Animals.”
Your dogs can get this status, too, but only if a real, licensed doctor writes you a note (48 hours in advance of flying) that states you have a mental health related disability (i.e. anxiety disorders) and that the animal needs to accompany you inside the airplane for your mental health.
TMZ readers had a field day with their O’Day story. Some readers called her names like ‘spoiled’ and lumped her in with other ‘L.A. phoney baloneys’. Others made fun of her dogs’ unfortunate dye jobs. Still another reader asked “Does the letter say if it’s ok for the dogs to hang their heads out the window …. weeeeeee.”
I’m not going to speculate on Ms. O’Day’s mental condition (although, judging by her spooky hollow eyes in the top picture, her condition is LIFE-SUCKING ALIEN INTRUDER). Still, if she feels the need to bring her pets with her (and take up two seats), who am I to object. Maybe they’re her supper. Plus I imagine they brought a lot of smiles to the other passengers. Well, at least the ones who aren’t violently allergic to dogs.
More importantly, I just learned that you can bring an Emotional Support Pony on an airplane, too.
That’s right: a HORSE. And it flies for free.
Again, all you need is a note from some doctor who says planes freak you out. And then you can fly with a pony. Check out this website for the Guide Horse Foundation. It explains all about why, the next time you see me on a plane, I’ll be escorted by My Little Pony.
“Monkey? Fetch me my slippers. GOOD MONKEY. Now pour this gin in my tonic, and stir it with your tail. GOOD MONKEY. Now throw feces at that glaring woman. GOOD MONKEY.”
What Emotional Support Animals would you like to bring on a plane?
— Ken Hegan